The Grammar Mechanics of Writing - Commas
Editing is something every author needs—whether they’re pursuing traditional publication (through either a large or small press) or indie publication (AKA self-publication). As an editor focused on the details of a novel, one essential piece I rarely see talked about is the power of punctuation. Punctuation is a necessary component of every novel, but many readers, editors, and writers simply see it as the mechanics/tools to convey the words on the page.
I believe differently—punctuation can be a powerful tool for writers to employ in their storytelling. Employing punctuation in the right way within a sentence or scene can help shape a reader’s understanding of that sentence or theme the writer is trying to convey. Choosing the right punctuation will enhance a reader’s experience, drawing them further into the story, rather than pulling them out of it.
This series of blog posts begins with the punctuation I hear writers complain about most—commas. The comma is definitely a tricky piece of the puzzle because it’s so versatile. In my own writing, I’ve had instances where I’ll add a comma to a sentence only to remove it on the next self-edit pass; then add it back in during a third editing pass.
The Chicago Manual of Style (CMOS) is a writer’s or editor’s best tool for understanding grammar in fiction. Most publishing houses utilize CMOS as the standard style guide for all publications they produce, along with in-house style guides. I’ll be utilizing definitions from this guide throughout our discussion on commas, and going by its guidelines as the industry standard.
On a specific note: these rules may change over time. As new technology emerges and generations move on, language tends to evolve along with it. The CMOS is usually timely in its adjustments to these kinds of changes, but the best way to be aware of industry-wide changes to grammar rules is to read widely in the genre you’re writing or editing.
Now, let’s get into our discussion about the most versatile of the punctuation marks: the comma. I’m going to address several different issues I commonly see in manuscripts, as well as a somewhat controversial topic among writers and editors. This list is by no means exhaustive—there are many, many rules for commas; I’m simply covering the main issues I see often as an editor.
The Oxford or Serial Comma
The first issue I’d like to address is the Oxford or serial comma. The CMOS advocates for its use to prevent ambiguity. Its use is as follows: “When a conjunction joins the last two elements in a series of three or more, a comma . . . should appear before the conjunction,” (CMOS 6.19).
There are a few iconic sentences demonstrating why the serial comma is useful for clarity. Let’s look at a few examples with and without this comma.
WITH serial comma: I had eggs, toast, and orange juice.
WITHOUT serial comma: I had eggs, toast and orange juice.
OR
WITH serial comma: We invited the pets, Mayor Strauss, and Madonna.
WITHOUT serial comma: We invited the pets, Mayor Strauss and Madonna.
In the first example, if we leave out the serial comma, the sentence could be interpreted as though we are telling the toast and orange juice we had eggs, instead of telling someone the three things we had for breakfast. The same applies to the second example: without the serial comma, it sounds as though the pets we invited were named Mayor Strauss and Madonna. This is the ambiguity we want to avoid.
Please keep in mind that this is CMOS—which is not used by most newspapers or magazines. These publications more commonly use the Associated Press (AP) Stylebook, which does not use the serial comma. Some non-fiction publishers may also utilize the AP Stylebook instead of CMOS; check previous publications if you’re curious. Overall, however, fiction publishers utilize CMOS and prefer use of the serial comma.
Commas and Conjunctions
In school, we learn that commas must always be used before a conjunction (and, but, etc.). This isn’t always true in fiction, provided the sentence is short enough and clear without the comma. Here’s what the CMOS has to say on the matter:
CMOS 6.22: “When independent clauses are joined by and, but, or, so, yet, or any other coordinating conjunction, a comma usually precedes the conjunction. If the clauses are very short and closely connected, the comma may be omitted unless the clauses are part of a series.”
WITH comma: We tried to stop him from running, but he was already gone.
WITHOUT comma: Sue presented their findings and Bob took notes.
Series WITH comma: Glen was the goalie, Sam played left wing, and Tom and Jim were defenders.
CMOS 6.35: “When a participle or adverbial phrase immediately follows a coordinating conjunction, the use of commas depends on whether the conjunction joins two independent clauses."
There are two different ways to do this:
(1) “If the conjunction is simply a part of the predicate or joins the compound predicate, the first comma follows the conjunction.”
Ex: The siblings trailed behind the rest but, at the prospect of finishing the journey, pushed on until the end.
(2) “If the conjunction joins two independent clauses, however, the comma precedes the conjunction.”
Ex: We were exhausted, but realizing there was no time to waste, we pushed forward toward the impending battle.
CMOS 6.28: “When a dependent clause intervenes between two other clauses joined by a coordinating conjunction, causing the coordinating and subordinating conjunctions to appear next to each other (e.g., and if, but when), the consecutive conjunctions need not be separated by a comma.”
Ex: The author finally returned the manuscript, and as soon as I opened it, I could see that it was the wrong version.
A special note on CMOS 6.28: This is something usually determined by the publishing house; CMOS acknowledges that the use of a comma between the conjunctions is also correct, and “may be preferred in certain cases for emphasis or clarity . . .” This can be publisher or author preference, or simply to ensure the meaning of a particular sentence comes across clearly. Let’s show this with our previous example:
Ex: The author finally returned the manuscript, and, as soon as I opened it, I could see that it was the wrong version.
Commas and Introductory Phrases or Words
Another thing we learn about grammatical commas during school is that they always follow an introductory word or phrase (such as “however”), but this is not always the case in fiction (are you noticing a trend?). I have a few explanations and examples below:
CMOS 6.38: “A comma usually follows an exclamatory oh or ah unless it is followed by an exclamation point or forms part of a phrase. No comma follows a vocative [vocal] oh or (mainly poetic) O.”
Ex: Ah, here we are at last.
Ex: Oh no!
Ex: My oh my!
CMOS 6.37: “A comma should follow an introductory yes, no, OK, well, or the like, except in certain instances more likely to be encountered in informal prose or dialogue.” Keep in mind this means it can be omitted within fiction—per the author’s or publisher’s stylistic choices.
Ex: No, Bob shouldn’t go to the school dance.
Ex: No you will not!
CMOS 6.26: “When a dependent clause precedes the main, independent clause, it should be followed by a comma. A dependent clause is usually introduced by a subordinating conjunction such as if, because, or when.”
Ex: Until we have seen the light, we can’t guarantee a safe exit.
CMOS 6.52: “Commas are traditionally used to set off conjunctive adverbs such as however, therefore, and indeed. When the adverb is essential to the meaning of the clause, or if the emphasis is on the adverb itself, commas are usually unnecessary.”
WITH comma: However, there is no time left for us.
WITHOUT comma: However many there are, we will fight them.
Although these aren’t introductory words, I’m including them in this section because the same principle applies.
CMOS 6.56: “The adverbs too and either used in the sense of ‘also’ generally need not be preceded by a comma. Note, however, that some authors prefer to use such commas . . .” However: “When too comes in the middle of the sentence or clause, a comma is more likely to be helpful.”
Ex: She had her cake and ate it too.
Ex: The swordsman lacked Rosie’s preferred weapon, and he didn’t have Jim’s either.
Ex: She, too, decided against it.
Commas and Dialogue
The last thing I want to address is the use of commas and dialogue. This one gets tricky, because it depends on how the dialogue, and dialogue tags, are set up. These are some of the most useful rules to follow as a fiction author, though. CMOS also speaks to the usage of commas in dialogue in several places:
CMOS 6.43: “An independent clause quoted in the form of dialogue or from text and introduced with said, asked, wrote, or the like is usually introduced with a comma . . . Commas are required regardless of the position of the explanatory text relative to the quotation.”
Ex: She replied, “I hope you aren’t referring to us.”
Ex: “You know,” he said, “it’s really not that big of a deal.”
CMOS 6.134: “When a question mark or explanation point appears at the end of a quotation where a comma would normally appear, as in quoted speech or dialogue, the comma is omitted.”
Ex: “Get out of there!” he yelled.
Ex: “What do you mean?” Lila asked.
CMOS 6.57: “Names or words used in direct address are set off by a comma (or two, in the middle of a sentence) . . . When introduced by a coordinating conjunction, the comma preceding the name is optional.”
Ex: Kai, you have to hurry.
Ex: Kiss me, you fool!
Ex: But John, we don’t know where to go.
These are the basic rules when it comes to dialogue with the typical said, etc. dialogue tags. However, when you get into action beats instead of dialogue tags, the rules are your typical rules. An example of dialogue with an action beat instead of a dialogue tag.
Ex: Ray jumped the small stream. “Hurry, Lei! They’re catching up!”
Ex: “I can’t believe he won the award instead of me.” Cal slumped in his seat, arms crossed.
A Word of Caution: Comma Splices
Before we wrap up our rules on commas, I want to note an easy pitfall when it comes to commas: comma splices. These are also referred to, most often, as “run-on sentences.”
CMOS 6.23: “When two independent clauses are joined by a comma alone—that is, without the help of a coordinating conjunction—the result is a type of run-on sentence known as a comma splice (to splice is to join) . . . the occasional comma splice can be effective, especially in conversational prose and creative writing . . .”
Ex (not used well): All watches display the time, some of them do so accurately.
Ex (used well, for effect): The announcer’s voice talking about Showa era, the freshness of the air, the students sitting around me.
In the second example, the omission of the coordinating conjunction (in this case, and) adds to the character voice coming across in the passage. For context, the character is attempting to ground herself in her current surroundings, so the omission of the conjunction gives the impression of stream-of-consciousness. Please note that this should not be overused in your storytelling. It can definitely be used effectively for emphasis or in conveying certain aspects of a character’s voice, but your story should not be riddled with them—and most editors would edit the majority of them out.
Some Closing Comments
Commas are definitely a tricky piece of punctuation to learn and do well—especially when the rules of fiction differ from what we grew up learning for essays. However, a well-placed comma can make a big impact on readers. They’re used to help the flow of the story, offering brief pauses for a reader to “breathe” before continuing the sentence. But too many commas in a sentence can be just as confusing as too few.
Dialogue in and of itself is trickier, because a character’s voice, and pace of speech, often determines how often commas or other “pausing” punctuation are used. If a character’s speaking quickly without taking a breath, you don’t want to include a comma in the middle of the phrase—otherwise, the reader won’t understand the character’s speaking quickly!
But they are, quite obviously, a very powerful piece of punctuation. If used correctly in storytelling, they can greatly enhance a reader’s experience and understanding of the story and characters.
I do want to warn that this shouldn’t be a worry during the writing process—wait until your self-edit phase to nitpick at your comma usage. Or, if you’re simply confused by all of the different rules and exceptions, hire a good copyeditor to fix those commas for you.